About three weeks ago, I participated in a small servant retreat. During the moment of reflection, the speaker made us question ourselves. He asked "Why do you follow Jesus?" Some people answered "Because He gives me hope", "Because He heals my wounds", "Because he saved me" etc.. Then he asked "Would you still follow Jesus if He didn't give you hope? Or if he didn't heal your wounds?" and so forth. I started to formulate answers that would sound good. But then I started to dig deep inside. I started to really question myself, and thinking back at my journey thus far. I reflected on my relationship with Jesus. I realized that maybe 5 years ago, I probably would have answered "No". Or maybe not...who knows? But today, I couldn't imagine my life without Jesus. I've been thru so many different stages, and situations in my life where God has proven to me that He's always there with me. I've been thru periods where I didn't feel the presence of God, or felt like He wasn't coming thru, and sometimes even questioned God. I've been upset at God, and fought with HIm. There were times where everything seemed to be falling apart and I just wanted to say "the heck with this". But at the end of the day, He has always showed up at the perfect time. He showed up to console me, to guide me, or just to listen to me. He was and is always there. He has been the one person (being) that I can ALWAYS count on. Throughout these many instances, and "tests" (sort of speak), I fell in love with Jesus.....True love. A love that doesn't just go away. Throughout this seven year journey, Jesus became my friend. My best friend. He has proven to me over and over that He truly loves me. He loves me everyday, in every situation, in every circumstance, no matter what I do, and just as I am. His love didn't end in the cross. It continues today, in every detail in my life.
So that day, at that retreat, I came to a conclusion: That not only does Jesus love me, but that I'm truly in love with Him. So--- Yes!!! I will still follow Jesus. Not because of what He can give me, but because of who He is.
I pray that everyone may find true love, just as I did. I love you Jesus!
"One thing I ask from the LORD, this only do I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze on the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple." Psalm 27:4
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